Pessimism and Mother Theresa

Today I have decided that everyone in my office should be subject to mandatory psychiatric examinations on a bi-weekly basis. Has anyone out there ever worked with a true pessimist...the kind that says, "Well sure I won the lottery, but by the time I pay all the taxes it'll be down to 132 million". Well, I work with two! And they are true champions of the "woe is me" campaign. Absolutely everything they come into contact with is spun one way and then the other until some negative connotation is gleaned from the perfectly peachy news they received to begin with. I have no idea how anyone can live their lives in this manner. Both of the ladies that I speak of are close to or past retirement age and, quite frankly, it astounds me that they have made it this far with that type of attitude. Their personalities have resulted in not a small amount of conflict as people are prone to bring their problems to me rather than face the negative attitudes of the others that I work with. Truthfully I don't mind that much but it saddens me to know that this is truthfully how they view the world around them. If I thought I could get away with slipping a little Prozac in their orange juice I'd be out filling the presciption right now. You see, Mother Theresa has nothing on me....aside from the possible sainthood of course. I'm too nice for my own good. Oh well, nothing to be done but....whistle while you work - la la la lalalala. That ought to send them right straight over the edge, as a matter of fact when I'm done humming the entire soundtrack to Cinderella I believe I'll start on that damn birthday song from the Olive Garden...you know the one - that charming "if Italy were sad and tone deaf" opera you get with the unlimited salad and breadsticks. I should really become a therapist, I think I have a gift.